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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
For many years now I have been receiving a daily barrage of email from an old friend in Sydney. She is a retired nurse and over 80. She has a send to all list, always listing the recipients as well. With little exception they are boring 'lovely pictures for Mother's Day' or worse, 'oldster emails.'

Six months ago, they stopped. I assumed she had gone on holiday somewhere.

After six weeks I wondered if she'd died. Did a quick obit. check, nope, not dead.

One possibility occurred, and that was that her computer had caught a virus and all addresses had been lost. Anyhow, that's what I'm running with.

I don't want to contact her again in case it starts all over.

Am I being chicken-hearted? Could I do it differently without risking a return to the past?
 

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nissan
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Do you want/need ongoing contact with her? If not leave as is. If you feel the need then contact her when the mood strikes. She may have also pruned her email outgoing list. Someone else may have told her enough.
 

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Rogue
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I wouldn't contact her unless you wanted to communicate. I often tell people to not send me their 'spam' emails about jokes, cute pictures, etc. If they want to communicate one-on-one or a small group no worries, mass emailing is annoying.

You have her contact email, she has yours, if you need to contact each other for some reason, you have the ability to.

I'll put another spin on it. What if a person or some people told her to stop sending them her emails and she took the feedback heavily and just stopped emailing everyone. Kind of like Ray stopping posting because a couple told him to piss off.
 

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After Monday and Tuesday, even the calender says W
06 Td42ti coil cab chassis
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She may be in a nursing home??
 

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Triton n Lovin it.
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I just look at the title and delete or read it. It really isn't that much of a drama in the big scheme of life Esty. ;)

Foo
 

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The Googlest, Apparently!
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I would say you are being chicken hearted.

She has put the effort in to send mails to you, even if they are as boring as bat chit, so it would appear that she thought enough of you to sent them in the first place.

So to me it would be the correct thing to do and enquire if she is well and OK.

If the mails start again, mass delete ... Not hard to do.

Or send her a note that you are changing your email due to spam and then open another account with Hotmail (or whom ever) and give her that. Then you can go in ocne a month (or year) and delete all.

But at least you will have done three things.

1. Found out if she is ok.

2. Let the old dear know you are thinking of her (which can mean a lot to some old people, especially those who have no one).

3. Soothed your troubled conscience.


Speaking of which, we were a bit worried about you old timer, so no just buggering off with out letting us know you are ok ya selfish old git... :p
 
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Previously known as twodiffs
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What Drillerboy said Esty..then you have piece of mind that you did the right thing.
 

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Discussion Starter · #9 ·
She has a large extended family. Son-in-law who lives nearby is a Quack. She is very wealthy having founded and operated two nursing businesses in Australia, both still going and run by her children.

She does not lack support and is not alone. If she were I'd have contacted her straight away.
 

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Master Coalroller
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Stop being awful and email her that you've missed her contact.
Do the right thing, if you didn't care you wouldn't have posted this thread.
 

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Every dog has his day
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Morals and ethics are a vast grey area; never absolute.

As Boundaryrider said, if it wasn't troubling your conscience you wouldn't be asking for thoughts on here.

I'd suggest you send her a friendly email asking how she is and what she's been up to, and if the worst thing that happens is that you get regular group emails for the trade off of making an elderly lady feel like her friendship is appreciated then with all due respect Esty, harden up a bit, the delete button isn't too hard to press.

First world problems, meh.
 

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nissan
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To me the solution is straight forward. Be up front and say what you mean. Send her an email. Tell her that you were a little worried about her because you had not heard from her in a while. Also tell her that you had taken a while to contact her because you were gratefull that torrents of gushy mush had stopped and you were in no hurry for it to resume but the long silence was giving you some concern for her welfare.

This will let her know that the spam is not welcome but you are thinking about her and concerned for her. She will be over the moon that you cared.

Cheers,
 
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