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R U Ok?

  • Yes

    Votes: 131 49.2%
  • No

    Votes: 43 16.2%
  • No but I'm going to say Yes anyway.

    Votes: 92 34.6%

  • Total voters
    266
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2016 CRD wagon
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Here is the honest assessment from me and then I gave it to my wife and she added more, so my soul has been laid bare here. (y)



Foo

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Good on you for posting this @Foo . It takes courage to be this honest.

Looking at that list I could honestly say I tick most of the same boxes and 2 of my boys would too! It's a fairly broad checklist, but I find it's usefulness is maybe more about awareness.

If you are aware if these things you also become more aware of how you react when in each situation, and how that might be taken by other people around you.

Depending on your mood at the time, you may tweeke your response a little and mentally measure any difference in the response and consider or reflect how that made YOU feel. That's what really counts (how it makes you feel).

This journey is all about you and the people closest to you. I'm sure you will hear and learn a lot about yourself that you won't necessarily enjoy hearing. You'll have two choices, to either get mad about it all or to learn and grow from the experience, maybe both at times.

Take it slow and Good Luck!
 

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Triton n Lovin it.
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23,923 Posts
Booked in for a cyst removal next Friday as it has near doubled in size in the last 1yr, to the point of where my son noticed it when I was wearing a t-shirt. Not really looking forward to it but I want the mongrel thing gone, so my head space about it is good. I will be so please to see the end of this year.

At least my eyes were found to be still pretty good, just need to monitor the formation of cataracts on my left one. Thankfully all of the rear parts are in good condition and nothing nasty starting there. Yeah life's a bundle of joy when chit goes down hill. 💩 🖕

Foo
 

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GUII ZD30DI Wgn
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Booked in for a cyst removal next Friday as it has near doubled in size in the last 1yr, to the point of where my son noticed it when I was wearing a t-shirt. Not really looking forward to it but I want the mongrel thing gone, so my head space about it is good. I will be so please to see the end of this year.

At least my eyes were found to be still pretty good, just need to monitor the formation of cataracts on my left one. Thankfully all of the rear parts are in good condition and nothing nasty starting there. Yeah life's a bundle of joy when chit goes down hill. 💩 🖕

Foo
Interesting, as you may know I had serious scare recently when I somehow got an infection in my right eye and lost vision, all I could see was a heavy fog, scared the bejesus out of me. You mention cataracts, I have my eyes tested and inspected annually and last year Malcolm mentioned cataracts were starting to form but probably a few years before it will affect me. When this latest scare happened my Doc organised an emergency appointment with an eye specialist and we went from there, I remembered Malcolm saying to me that when I needed cataract surgery the eye could be reworked so as glasses/contacts were no longer required, I mentioned this to the eye specialist (who is the one that does this kind of stuff) and he said yes no problem, I have all the paperwork for it and 3 weeks to decide whether I wish to go ahead with it now or put it off until later, decisions, decisions.
 

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Triton n Lovin it.
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Interesting, as you may know I had serious scare recently when I somehow got an infection in my right eye and lost vision, all I could see was a heavy fog, scared the bejesus out of me. You mention cataracts, I have my eyes tested and inspected annually and last year Malcolm mentioned cataracts were starting to form but probably a few years before it will affect me. When this latest scare happened my Doc organised an emergency appointment with an eye specialist and we went from there, I remembered Malcolm saying to me that when I needed cataract surgery the eye could be reworked so as glasses/contacts were no longer required, I mentioned this to the eye specialist (who is the one that does this kind of stuff) and he said yes no problem, I have all the paperwork for it and 3 weeks to decide whether I wish to go ahead with it now or put it off until later, decisions, decisions.
My Dad has had laser work done on both eyes and is very happy with the outcome.

Foo
 

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Triton n Lovin it.
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I'm okay but isn't it funny how you can think so little of yourself worth but then you read what friends say about you and yet you don't realise how much you are thought of!!!!!!!! :unsure:

I always try to help/encourage others in my sport/life and around me to stay positive and better their best efforts, yet, I'm so friggin hard on my own assessments on my own life and ability. :unsure::cry:

I've still got some crap to get out of the way yet, with medical things = head space/personality/reactions but I'm trying to better myself and be more socially receptive to how people see me. (don't know if that is the correct wording)

Rambling now, well maybe?

I have always chosen to make sure that the income that I have, will cover bills the cost of living and allow us, to be able to pay our bills, yet, this has come back to bite me on the arse big time = "you're never here and have not, been there for support!" :unsure:

My mind set, has always been to keep us out of trouble but in thinking this way, I've also missed out on a lot of the momentous points of my kids growing up and this, can never be replicated. :cry: Yet, I'm the bad/uncaring person in the family = not listening, not there for support or anything else that you want to label me with. 🥺 I was ever only a phone call away but...............

Does anyone really think, the dad/father of a family, that really does, love, his wife and kids, would sacrifice so much, to keep them with a roof and food on the table? 😒

Foo
 

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2016 CRD wagon
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@Foo Reading your story and comments continually makes me reflect on my own experiences. I conclude that no one is perfect!!

Its a tough gig being the sole bread winner for the family. Making sure there is enough coin for the family to be safe, happy and healthy with a roof over their heads and plan for a future.

It's a tough gig being the home keeper/peace keeper making sure everything happens, everyone is fed and clothed, homework, schooling, dentist, doctor, birthdays, bills paid etc etc.

I've sat on both sides of the fence and feel I may have some insight of the thoughts and expectations from each. I certainly see things a little differently because of that but at the same time understand why both sides of that fence think so differently.

Finding the balance is not easy. Requires a lot of work and awesome communication between both partners regardless of who is in which role. It may even be harder than having shared roles.

Finding time for each other, yourself and for exercise is something most people underestimate. Without any one of these, it seems jealousy and inequitable thoughts can, and will, creep into the relationship and cracks will eventually start to show over time. Finding time for everyone is impossible. There seems to always be a trade off.

My conclusion.......I don't know. Not sure anyone does. But I do know that without open and free communication, you can't possibly get it nearly right.

It's late and I'm rambling, but sitting here in the childrens hospital with Alex gives me lots of time to think about stuff.

Keep talking to us mate. We are all learning a little about ourselves through your journey and that's got to be good in the long run!

Cheers

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Thanks mate but I hope your young bloke is okay?

Foo
 
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